In our journey through life, we all have moments when our needs aren't met, particularly within our relationships. It’s a universal experience, yet it often carries an unfair stigma. We’re social beings, naturally wired to connect with others, and when those connections falter or our needs go unfulfilled, it can deeply affect how we interact with the world around us.

The Weight of Unmet Needs
When our relational needs aren't met, we tend to respond in one of two ways. Some of us might shut down, turning inward and masking our needs, almost as if they don't exist. This silent suffering often goes unnoticed, but it’s no less painful. Others might seek connection more openly, perhaps in ways that are visible and sometimes misunderstood by those around them. This more outward expression of need is often labeled as being "needy" or "clingy," a judgment that can be both hurtful and isolating.

These labels can be particularly damaging, especially for those who have experienced trauma or grew up in environments where their needs were consistently ignored or invalidated. If your early experiences taught you that your needs didn't matter, it's no wonder that expressing those needs feels like a challenge. You might not even be fully aware of what your needs are, let alone how to communicate them effectively. This can leave you feeling disconnected, both from yourself and from others.

Consider the phrase: I am allowed to take up space

Directions: Consider these words. Let your mind hold them while you consider speaking this truth out loud. As you are able, allow yourself to speak these words into existence. Allow yourself to feel into the space of your own being. When you feel ready, imagine existing fully in your own body. Imagine what it would feel like to notice a need within you and ask for someone to meet it externally. As you can, practice engaging with this concept and consider how you could take up even 1% more space in your own life.

Breaking the Cycle
The truth is, having needs doesn’t make you needy—it makes you human. It's completely reasonable to seek out connection and to want your needs to be met. The key is recognizing that there are healthier ways to express and address those needs, ways that foster connection rather than push others away.

As we heal, we can start to develop new strategies for connection. This involves learning to recognize our needs, understanding how to communicate them effectively, and finding people who are capable of meeting us where we are. It's a process of re-learning how to be in relationship with others, one that requires patience, self-awareness, and a lot of self-compassion.

Embracing Your Humanity
To those of you who have been labeled as "needy," to those who feel isolated in your suffering, and to those who are desperately longing to be seen—I see you. Your needs are valid, and your desire for connection is a natural part of who you are. As you continue on your path of healing, know that it’s okay to seek out the relationships that can meet your needs, and it’s okay to be honest about what those needs are.

Join us on Monday, August 26th at 7 PM CST for our Somatic Movement and Meditation Group, where we'll be exploring the theme of Surrender. It's all about gently being present with yourself and what is, allowing you to tune in more deeply to your needs and inner self. This session is a perfect match for anyone looking to connect with themselves in a meaningful way. We'd love to have you with us!

Remember, dear one, you don’t have to navigate this journey alone. It’s through connection that we find healing, and it’s through understanding ourselves that we learn to connect in more meaningful ways. You deserve to be seen, heard, and understood—not in spite of your needs, but because of them.

Let’s continue to break down the harmful labels and embrace the complexity of our human experience. By doing so, we make space for deeper, more authentic connections, both with ourselves and with others.

Thank you for letting me see you,